How Rude! The Full House Podcast (Comedy)

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Becca Slack may have shocked those in power with her sassy attitude and fondness for questioning authority, but that's just what we look for when scouting potential Rude Dudes. Today we're examining "Mr. Egghead", in which Joey's already muddled career takes a sharp turn into terrible children's programming. But that's not all, folks: Danny is using DJ in an attempt to get out of a $30 traffic ticket and Stephanie's impending Picture Day could prove her undoing. There's a lot going on, maybe too much, but whatever! Don't worry, we make time for Becca's Picture Day memories, as well as her Dad's love of outgoing answering machine messages. Do any of us care about the gender of a ghost we can't see so long as it's giving us the best oral sex of our lives? Will Jon provide us with an extended review of Beastly, now available on Amazon Prime, even if we didn't ask for it? Find out now! There's no way you'll discover the answer by reading this, you Bozo! XOXO

Direct download: 58._Mr._Egghead.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:59pm EST

Cat McDonnell may have spent the majority of her childhood in the stuffy ol' land of England (where birthdays are about as celebrated as a hernia) but that didn't snuff out her joyous spirit. Said spirit is on full display for this, our 57th episode! Break out the Bobby Brown cassingle and oh so sensual bottle of catsup, because DJ is officially a teenager and everyone wants her to get laid. Everyone is dancing in this episode: Danny, Becky, Jesse, even little Michelle is getting her groove on with a particularly famous cartoon rabbit. It's fucking surreal! We're gonna learn all about Cat's first kiss and her recent encounter with a grown-up game of Spin the Bottle, so join us for the fun or see you next Tuesday. Ha-ha, just kidding, WE LOVE YOU ALL. XOXO

Direct download: 57._13_Candles.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:24pm EST

Eddie Klinker is no stinker. He's one of the red hot stars of CIC's 'Roast Beef' and our honorary Rude Dude for the week! Come along as we take a look at "Bye Bye Birdie", in which a spoiled Michelle finally gets her comeuppance on the first day of preschool and Stephanie's obsession with DJ has dire ramifications. Also on the table: Who on the call sheet was Eddie's first source of erotic arousal? Where can we learn more about Brandon's new spin on the table? Why the fuck was "Misty's Song" released as a single in Germany? As usual, we have a lot of questions, but we only have so much time. You know what we'd appreciate? A five star review in the iTunes Store. Get on it. We love you, Eddie! XOXO

Direct download: 56._Bye_Bye_Birdie.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:08am EST

Virginia Muller may have sneered at her older brothers' antics while practicing witchcraft in her mother's bedroom, but that doesn't make her a creep! Look, it's her prerogative, and she gonna do what she gonna do, okay? I mean for crying out loud, she chose to sit with us in a broiling studio apartment for the purposes of this week's episode, so her instincts can't be totally wonky, right? For #55 we're discussing "Lust in the Dust", in which the girls set Danny up with a "messy" dance teacher. In other news, that adorable tater tot beloved by millions is hiding your shit and she's loving every Goddamn second of your anxiety. What else do we got for ya? Dating dealbreakers, Stephanie GIFs, and one of the most confusing resumes for a guest star to date. Spoiler: There are two identical Karens in this universe, as well as two identical Connies. It's fucking bug nut nuts. Ciao, we love you!

Direct download: 55._Lust_in_the_Dust.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:35pm EST

Mary Beth Smith is no stranger to the world of podcasts. Her show, MBSing, is fantastic and you should definitely make it part of your regular rotation. That's not a recommendation, it's a straight up demand! Have you become a subscriber? Cool. Good. Join us as we comb through "Misadventures in Babysitting", a tale of one young girl's attempt to secure her own phone line. It's also the tale of a poker game gone awry and why positive communication between lovers is bullshit. Look, it's a complex tale! Also: Clarissa, Sabrina, Touched By An Angel, C-Bear and Jamal, Girl Meets World, and Dragonball Z! Bruce Baum is back and Mike Binder's 'The Sex Monster' sounds like a miserable piece of sexist garbage. Love you! XOXO

Direct download: 54._Misadventures_in_Babysitting.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:12pm EST

Saurabh Pande may be an incorrigible rascal but that doesn't mean he can't be an honorary Rude Dude just like everyone else. To prove it, he came to the studio and helped us examine "No More Mr. Dumb Guy", in which Jesse's ego is shattered by intellectuals operaring at a 10th grade level. Meanwhile, Danny is assaulting an oblivious patron of the arts and Michelle is using her gift of language to shut everyone right the fuck down. We'll also get to know a homeless film critic and dive once again into the resumes of former Full House guest stars, so prepare yourself for all of that! Have you snuck onto a friend's laptop and subscribed to the show via iTunes? It's a breach of trust, sure, but they'll thank you for it. THEY WILL THANK YOU.

Direct download: 53._No_More_Mr._Dumb_Guy.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:43pm EST

Today's episode features Brandon and Jonathon and ... oh yeah, Sarah Dell'Amico! But unlike Stacey from this week's particularly disorienting chunk of Full House, Sarah is an absolute joy. Come along with us as we dive once more into the world of advertising and discover why it makes no Goddamn sense whatsoever. And hey, if you've been searching for inspiration for that Comet/Mr. Bear fuck fiction, search no more, weary traveler. Additional docket topics include cocktail wieners, the joys of a good hotel room, and why Florida probably shouldn't be your choice for young romance. It's a hoot and you'll even get to hear our sterling Roseanne impressions, so clean out your canals and get to listening right the heck now. XOXO

Direct download: 52._Joey__Stacey_and_..._Oh_Yeah_Jesse.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:12pm EST

Boom! Rattle! Roll! Hold on to your hats and your socks, guys and gals, because this week we're discussing "Aftershocks" with the one and only Libby Schreiner! Libby is our 50th guest and honorary Rude Dude and she brings a particularly keen insight to the table. We're gonna need it if we're to diagnose poor Stephanie, who walks away from San Fran's latest tremblor like she's coming out of Vietnam. She can't take it, man! The quake is all around her, man! In other news, DJ is playing Mrs. Claus in the Christmas play (this is a Christmas episode, apparently) and she has a big honking zit on her sniffer! Poor DJ. Poor, dumb, illogical DJ. We'll also learn about Libby's fear of a very particular scientific occurrence and why everyone was talking about Cody back in junior high. It wasn't because he was popular, we'll tell ya that much. Thank you to the lovely individuals who penned our latest five star reviews in the iTunes Store. Follow their lead and write your own today! XOXO

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Direct download: 51._Aftershocks.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:02pm EST

Lindsay Lewin joins us this week to discuss "The Greatest Birthday on Earth", in which Michelle celebrates the beginning of her third year on this miserable planet. Coincidentally, we recorded this episode on Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's birthday, and we had no Goddamn clue. So yeah, happy belated birthday, you scary witch sisters! But enough about them, what about Lindsay? Well, she's got all kinds of birthday memories on deck, including her financially debilitating love for a certain JTT. Did we mention she was a member of TLC? She was totally a member of TLC, the group you immediately bring to mind when those letters are said out loud, strung together. We promise! As always, please take a moment to pen a five star review for us in the iTunes Store and tell all of your friends about the show. #SpreadtheWord #XOXO

Direct download: 50._The_Greatest_Birthday_on_Earth.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:56pm EST

Michael Gau is our esteemed guest this week and his enthusiasm for 'Full House' beats out anything we've seen thus far. He genuinely loves the show and has a crackerjack story about seeing Jodie Sweetin speak. Was the shirt he wore at the time a little disturbing? Sure. Perhaps even more than a little! We're tackling "Dr. Dare Rides Again" this week, in case you didn't already know. Who is Jesse in 1990? Is he Dr. Dare ... or Dr. Dairy Farm Cowboy Apron Nancy Pants? Scott Baio is on hand to lend his perspective and push our beloved Uncle to the edge. Also: Comet is back and annoying the FUCK out of poor Michelle. Additionally: Scary ladder stories, finding your true self in and out of college, and whether it's okay to own a denim jacket that sports leather sleeves. One more thing: WE LOVE YOU.

Direct download: 49._Dr._Dare_Rides_Again.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:53pm EST

Saliha Muttalib was once the member of a sister gang. She gave it up after a pair of life altering moments and now works alone under the guise of Ghost Pussy. Look, we're gonna unpack all of that this week, but all you really have to know is "Divorce Court" provided a lot more for us to discuss than the execrable "Puppy Love". Who exactly is getting a divorce? DJ and Stephanie. Can sisters get a divorce? No. Should grown men spend their time making foolish Halloween bets and should grown women spend their time filming the results? No. No, no, a thousand and one Arabian no's. But this is how the Tanners operate and at this point we can't really be surprised. Saliha is a joy and we are so glad she came by the official Rude Dude studio. MAKE. SOME. TIME. And pen a positive review for us in the iTunes Store! It won't take but a moment. Get your fingers working, baby!

Direct download: 48._Divorce_Court.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:42pm EST

"And They Call It Puppy Love" marks a new low for the already dire series. It's a droning black hole of television almost entirely devoid of incident. There's a dog! Jesse is studying for his driver's test! We can't boil it down any further than that. Luckily, the one and only Adal Rifai was there with us every step of the way, racing past Joey's excerable dog "impression" and an unsettling amount of familial intimacy. We learned all about Adal's first steps into comedy after being a quiet kid for years, as well as his time working for the somewhat seedy operation known as Family Video. And soon you'll learn about it too! Get those ears primed, guys and gals. Full House may have let us down but WE will never let YOU down. Rude. Dudes. Rude. Dudes! XOXO

Direct download: 47._And_They_Call_It_Puppy_Love.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:55pm EST

Tyler Davis joined us for our 46th episode and we think that's a snap and a half! Newsflash: Joey's time in the comedy world is quickly running out and only a successful appearance on Star Search will bring him back from the brink. He has goals! He has standards! He's an idiot. He's insufferable. But hey, if you were wondering about our respective Bobe Hope impressions then THIS is the episode for YOU, baby. Also on deck: Gundam nostalgia, the nebulous rules of Pog matches, animation aspirations, and way too much insight on the little loved 'Kung Pow! Enter the Fist'. Have you taken a moment to find us in the iTunes Store and show us some love with five shiny stars? If you've been with us for some time and have yet to shower us with your shiny star love, please do so today. We'll hug ya and we'll kiss ya! XOXO

Direct download: 46._Star_Search.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:24am EST

Well, let's just get this out in the open: I, Jon Pernisek, truly am the worst. At a certain point during this episode I completely make an ass out of myself and for that I apologize to my co-host and buddy, Brandon. I am sorry, Brandon! That said, let's focus on the positives, like this week's wonderful guest, Alison Lynch! She's here to help us discuss "Granny Tanny", a timely episode in that it focuses on Moms. Who are mothers? What are mothers? Why do we love and adore them so much, especially when they turn into fancy Grandmothers? Also, why are people kissing each other SO MUCH in this episode? Seriously, it's a new record for gross kissing. Stop it! Also: The resume of Doris Roberts, shoelace techniques, Looney Tune comparisons, and bedtime issues. It's all here! And yes, I'm still the worst. I'm worse than Charlie Brown! Aye, me. See you next week, guys and gals. XOXO

Direct download: 45._Granny_Tanny.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:04am EST

Michael Gomez is here to aid us in our discussion of "Nerd for a Day" and that is most certainly a boom. What's happening to America's sort of favorite white family this time around? Stephanie is casually decimating the spirit of a classmate. A hug therapist is bringing Danny and Joey closer, literally if not figuratively. DJ is studying Michelle as part of some vague English assignment. Also: Harry is back. BOOM. You'll learn a lot about Michael in our interview, including his penchant for catch phrases and predilection for a particular part of the human anatomy. No, it's not the kneecap. Have you taken a moment to give us a positive iTunes review? Be a boom and do that today! XOXO

Direct download: 44._Nerd_for_a_Day.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:55am EST

Justine Krueger comes from a weird clan and she's bringing her all for this, the 43rd episode of the podcast! Join us as we pick apart "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do (In 22 Minutes)", in which the greatest romance in television history is nearly dismantled by an age-old debate: Which is better, horsing or music? The stakes have never been lower! Sorry, I mean higher, clearly this is a big deal. Supplemental viewing: 'Look Who's Talking' and 'Fat Man and Little Boy'. One is about a sassy baby. The other is about the Manhatten Project. There's literally no way of knowing which is which. Justine, we thank you for being yet another wonderful guest on our roster. And we thank YOU, the listener, for giving us a positive review in the iTunes Store! XOXO

Direct download: 43._Breaking_Up_Is_Hard_To_Do_in_22_Minutes.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:55pm EST

Steve Labedz just got a mani-pedi and he is more than ready to help us take down "Back to School Blues", in which DJ learns how to slut shame her fellow students in the poisonous jungle that is JUNIOR HIGH. In other news, Joey and Jesse go golfing and holy hell does it result in a whole lot of nothing. Stick around as we learn about Steve's egghead days and why Brandon's foray into television is gonna be real big. Real big, baby. Hey: Have you carved out a bit of time to leave a review in the iTunes Store? We love those sweet, sweet stars, baby. You know who gave us five stars? STEVE LABEDZ. And he's the best! Be like Steve.

Direct download: 42._Back_to_School_Blues.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:55pm EST

Meredith Stepien may or may not be a black cat. We may never know! She may or may not be able to reach her long lost "Aunt" through this podcast. We may never know! She may or may not manage to identify the song that's in her head, but again, we may never know! Spoiler: We found out what song Meredith is talking about but you can only discover the answer by checking us out on Facebook. Look, all we know FOR SURE is she's our guest for Episode 41, in which we deconstruct the fever-pitch pacing and bizarre left turns of "Tanner's Island". Congratulations, dummies, we're officially in season three. Meredith was a joy to have in the studio (and a joy in life in general) so don't skip out on her goofy-great stories. Meow! Meow!

Direct download: 41._Tanners_Island.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:13am EST

Who's that calling in on the teen line? Why, it's none other than Nick Delehanty, our esteemed guest for this week! Yes, we're back after a four month hiatus. If you didn't notice the hiatus it's because we've been releasing backlogged recordings on a bi-weekly basis, but no more. We are now back to a regular, weekly release schedule, so let's get cozy, shall we? Nick is here to help us discuss both parts of "Luck Be A Lady", in which Jesse is bound and determined to cinch poor Becky to his hip for life. In other news, Joey may have won $100k and we learn more about the series 'Simon and Simon' than anyone would care to know in a lifetime. If you have to ask if Nick is great then you clearly haven't met Nick. He's great! Stick around for his carnie stories and find out why children may or may not be a good idea for you. XOXO

Direct download: 40._Luck_Be_A_Lady_Parts_1_and_2.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:53pm EST

Atra Asdou is here to call you a dickhole and call it a day. But before she calls you a dickhole and calls it a day, she's gonna help us discuss I'm There For You, Babe, in which Jesse plays the role of Atlas and finds himself bearing the weight of the world on his shoulders. Cookies, soccer practice, jingles, wedding, music, car repair, where does it end, WHERE DOES IT END? In the grave, Jesse. In the cool, calming dirt ... of the grave. Atra is also here to tell us about herself but here's something we learned after turning the microphone off: Atra's brother used to put cheese slices in sockets and then eat said cheese from said sockets. Right? Truth is always stranger than fiction, folks. Hey, why not take a moment to leave us a review in iTunes, you ungrateful goon? XOXO

Direct download: 39._Im_There_For_You_Babe.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Caroline Thrasher just finished some steamy Sailor Moon fan fiction and is ready to help us break down Blast From the Past, in which a woman named Patty turns up to use Joey while rebounding from a vicious divorce. Hey, remember when Joey had a girlfriend and she dressed up like Olive Oyl? What the hell was her name again? Ah well, maybe we shouldn't worry about it. Meanwhile, Danny does his taxes and Jesse is a Goddamn straight up Merlin. But that's not all! Stay tuned as Caroline dishes on magic, boys and why her current catch phrase is "Kill me." Have you left us a lovely review on iTunes or told your friends about us? Please do! XOXO

Direct download: 38._Blast_From_the_Past.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Brian Holden is here to help us discuss ... wait, is that Brian or Erica? Are there some straight up Mrs. Doubtfire shenanigans going on in this studio of ours? We're gonna have to get to the bottom of this, but in the meantime, let's just assume it was Brian who helped us discuss Goodbye, Mr. Bear, in which Danny's frothing enthusiasm for spring cleaning results in Stephanie losing her most prized companion. And if you think it won't take a hard turn into depression, think again. This one is SAD, folks, so break out your tissues and tuck in. Then when it's all said and done be sure to head on over to the iTunes Store and let us know what you think. Go-go-go! P.S. Do you think Erica would go out with us? She seems super hot!

Direct download: 37._Goodbye_Mr._Bear.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Ryan Asher may have been a chatterbox in the eyes of her teachers but here in the How Rude! forum she's just what you'd want in a guest: Fun, fanciful and fabulous. Join us as we peel back the layers of El Problema Grande de D.J., in which Danny macks on a starstruck Spanish teacher and D.J. stomps around complaining about her sorry lot in life. Aye-aye-aye, the stakes have never been higher! Ryan has a batch of great stories, some of which are delightful and others that are downright disturbing, so if you know what's good for you, you'll start listening now. Right the hell now, grunt! Oh, have you left us a review in the iTunes Store? Then get on that as well, grunt!

Direct download: 36._El_Problema_Grande_de_D.J..m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Mallory Bradford just got out of her cheerobics class (brought to you by Matrick Swayze and the hits of today) and is ready to shake it off with an earnest discussion of Baby Love. WARNING: This is yet another particularly gross bit of podcasting, as the sitcom forces us to consider baby romance. Full House pushes us to these extremes, people, we can't help ourselves when under its horrible spell! Anyway, Michelle falls in love and Stephanie practically has a bowel movement while watching The Wolfman. Also: Mallory is a star, despite her parent's objections, and Brandon is a weirdo. Let's dive in!

Direct download: 35._Baby_Love.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Amy Thompson is currently working on her audition for the Police Academy! reboot but she was nice enough to sit with us and evaluate Pal Joey, in which Danny's festering resentment leads him to literally dig up the past and inspire a dreadful flashback to the 1960s. Meanwhile, there's a new chief in town when Harry falls head over heels for that backstabbing trollop of a slattern known as DJ. Amy was a positive peach of a guest and we think you're gonna dig her interview, so don't miss a second of her SFX antics. Reviews! iTunes! Five stars! Tumblr, Facebook, you know the drill!

Direct download: 34._Pal_Joey.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Mark Campbell is wearing an adorable Charlie Brown sweater and consequently could not be more prepared to discuss Little Shop of Sweaters, in which a perfect storm of idiotic circumstances lands DJ and Stephanie in prison. Well, maybe. Look, crimes are Goddamn straight up perpetrated in this half hour of television and we won't stand for it, ya hear? If you're a child thief like Mark or wanna hear about the Pokemon who didn't quite make the original roster, you're gonna Goddamn dig this episode of podcasting. Goddamn dig it, baby! XOXO

Direct download: 33._Little_Shop_of_Sweaters.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Nnamdi Ngwe may be out of breath from doing the Running Man for three minutes straight but he's ready to tackle Working Mothers, an episode where the title somehow manages to be more sexist than the content it represents. Look, all you need to know is Joey and Jesse might enter the advertising world full time and everyone is conspiring against them in the name of routine. The Tanners WILL NOT have their routine fucked royally by your insipid dreams! Nnamdi also gives us some insight on what it means to be a cool kid who couldn't help but kill it, be it on the soccer field or on the floor of his own private dance hall. Nnamdi is the best, so PAY ATTENTION.

Direct download: 32._Working_Mothers.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Adam Levin is no fool and that's why he's in school ... to earn his honorary degree in the art of being a rude dude! Look, these setups don't write themselves, people, LAY OFF. Adam is here to help us take down Fogged In, in which the Tanner household is consumed by a force straight out of Transylvania and everyone is forced to confront their personal shit. Jesse is afraid of emotions! DJ has no respect for personal space! Kimmy is somewhere, unseen, hovering mere inches above the ground as an ancient recitation spews from her coarse, blood-stained lips! A lot is happening. Stick around for the interview portion to learn about little Adam's unflailing need to respect authority, as well as the moment he realized death comes for us all. It's a hoot!

Direct download: 31._Fogged_In.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Lori Lewis may or may not be slowly stealing carefully chosen attributes from Lori Laughlin as part of some treachorous scheme ripped wholesale from a discarded Cronenberg movie .. and we're fine with that! Lori is here to help us evaluate the pros and cons of A Little Romance, in which Becky offers the men to a frothing horde of sexually starved women and DJ has her heart broken by Bastian as part of the neverending story that is ROMANCE. Also: Brandon's cool new song is given a spice injection when Jon gets in on the mix and Lori tells us about her lovey dovey salad days. It's a great episode that, like all the others, you won't wanna miss, so get on it, dude!

Direct download: 30._A_Little_Romance.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Eunji Kim is wearing a hat and ready to help us discuss Middle Age Crazy, in which Stephanie marries her friend Harry in an attempt to escape the suffocating ambivalence of her family. Seriously, no one cares about Stephanie. It's a bummer! Eunji, on the other hand, is a star in the sky and we were so happy to have her on the show it's straight up ridiculous. Tell your friends and family to check out this and all of our past adventures and hey, why not leave a review in the iTunes Store? Word of mouth is key in the podcasting game, and if you want more of Eunji slapping Brandon in his own fuck dungeon, we need your gums to start flappin'. Start flappin', gums!

Direct download: 29._Middle_Age_Crazy.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Rich Alfonso may no longer be a child but, like all of us, he is a child at heart, which makes him more than qualified to discuss Our Very First Christmas Show. Prepare youself: Jesse's parents are heavily invested in his sex life, Danny is determined to convert his stale home movies into morning TV gold, and Stephanie has a crisis of faith when a snowstorm strands the Tanners at an airport terminal / bus station. We also learn about Rich's family traditions as well as what we pined for gift-wise as kids. Oh, and spoiler alert: Magic is all too real in the Full House universe and nothing will be the same as a result. As always, find us in the iTunes Store and leave us a five star review, 'cause only listeners like you can help us get the word out!

Direct download: 28._Our_Very_First_Christmas_Show.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Eric Harrington is a fart machine and he won't work for nobody but himself! He's also a beautiful guy and we were delighted to have him on to discuss Triple Date, in which Danny discovers his new flame is Jesse's OLD flame. Eh? Ya in? Meanwhile, DJ and Stephanie find themselves in a premise Lucille Ball would have found tiresome in the '50s. Will Danny get laid now that he's officially done humoring the ghost of his dead wife? Will Joey get laid considering he's, you know, a big bag of dumb? As always, ya gotta use your ears to find out. Make sure you peck out a quick review for us in the iTunes Store and use our Facebook page to find out all about our social media activity. You are our sons and daughters!

Direct download: 27._Triple_Date.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

MJ Price has a GPA no lower than 3.8 and this reason alone made her more than qualified to be a guest on our dumb, dumb show. She's a firecracker, a real gem, and she's here to help us discuss Joey Gets Tough. This one has it all, folks: Karate! Tiffany, live from Tokyo! Dave Coulier trying his best (we assume) attempt at angry acting! And just over there, to the side, in B Plot Land, Jesse and the Rippers are desperately trying to plug their show at The Sleeve. It's definitely television. Tell your friends about us, remember to pen an iTunes review if the mood strikes you, and find us on Facebook for all your social media needs. We love you like you were our own, dammit!

Direct download: 26._Joey_Gets_Tough.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Zack Shornick is an honorary Rude Dude ... but he may also be the last. Will Jon ever forgive Brandon for calling him a poopy poop-filled poop goblin? Even if Brandon apologized, would that be enough to bring them together once more? Only God and his divine angels know for sure. In the meantime, let's chat about Beach Boy Bingo, in which D.J. wins a stupid radio contest and the stupid Beach Boys show up to stumble around for a few minutes before putting on an awful concert for drunk college kids. It's a DISASTER. Zack is a gem, though, and we think he'll be a great co-host for Jon once Brandon is shipped off to some vague foreign land. Bye, Brandon! That's what you get for calling Jon a poopy poop-filled poop goblin! XOXO

Direct download: 25._Beach_Boy_Bingo.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Claire Meyer is casting a side eye at your fake leg and is more than willing to do the same for the likes of Full House. This week we turn out attention to Jingle Hell, in which Joey spends his coke-fueled witching hours constructing puppets just so he can destory any chance Jesse has at a career in advertising. Great job, Joey! You're doing great! Claire was an absolutely fantastic guest and a veritable wellspring of Housewife trivia, so if your ears are ready, we're ready to fill 'em with audio goodness! P.S. Claire may or may not have a thing for Bob Saget. We may never know the truth! Remember, you can always leave us a glowing review in the iTunes store when you feel the time is right, or visit us on Facebook, Libsyn, or Tumblr. Send us e-mails at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com, while you're at it! XOXO

Direct download: 24._Jingle_Hell.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Toby McMullen rode his fly as hell, awesome as fuck skateboard to the studio so he could aid in our discussion regarding D.J.'s Very First Horse, in which the oldest of the Tanner girls makes some startling discoveries while on the back of a strong, noble stallion named Rocket. Spoiler: Jonathon gets particularly graphic when describing said discoveries, but if you're allowing children to listen to this podcast that's clearly your mistake, not ours. Toby is a big ol' goof and we loved having him on the show, so let us know you feel the same way by leaving a five star review on iTunes and writing us at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. Tumblr, Facebook, Libsyn, Stitcher, we're all up on it, so help us spread the word! XOXO

Direct download: 23._D.J.s_Very_First_Horse.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Margaret Lebron just got out of an unproductive meeting with her high school guidance counselor and is more than ready to help us pick apart It's Not My Job, in which Jesse's vaguely Italian-Greek-Jewish-Bronx parents pay the Tanner home a visit and tensions arise over the family business (the family business being little more than a vague front for the mob). It's a great podcasting session so make sure you let us know as much on iTunes with a five star review or an e-mail sent directly to thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. And don't forget to tell your friends about us!

Direct download: 22._Its_Not_My_Job.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Stephen Kropa is in the house and let it be known right here and now: The studio gets a little dank during this recording session, ladies and gentlemen. The boys are sweaty and swampy, but they wouldn't have it any other way because they're RUDE DUDES, of course! Join them as they discuss Tanner vs. Gibbler, a harrowing tale of a friendship torn asunder by two 6th grade brats and someone known as The Duke. Will DJ and Kimmy repair their bond before the credits roll? Find out! Is their tale half as harrowing as Stephen's tale of The Three Lost Birthday Parties? No, it most assuredly isn't! Leave us a nice iTunes review, shoot us an e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com, follow us on Tumblr and Facebook and otherwise love the living hell out of us. We're so sweaty!

Direct download: 21._Tanner_vs._Gibbler.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Kate Kershaw took off her fancy winter gloves so she could give Cutting It Close a thorough examination. In this, the first episode of Season 2, Stephanie alters the course of Jesse's life forever during a simple game of Salon. Here's a lesson for all you new parents out there: A simple game of Salon shouldn't involve a pair of enormous, all too real scissors. Write that down, new parents! We also get to hear about Kate's childhood growing up in Appalachia as well as her sterling Roger Rabbit impression, so don't miss out, ya rude dudes! P.S. Have you left us a five star review in the iTunes Store? You'll receive kisses if you do! We're also on Tumblr (hrpodcast.tumblr.com) and feedback can be sent to thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. Thanks again to Zack Shornick for our logo and Cary Davenport for that spiffy cover of the Full House theme!

Direct download: 20._Cutting_It_Close.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Nico Carter was gonna go outside and fuck around but instead chose to stand with us and pick apart D.J. Tanner's Day Off, in which an absolutely exhausted pop star / drug addict morosely agrees to give the titular daughter an autograph ... but at what cost, Stacey Q? AT WHAT COST? As always, please encourage your friends to give us a shot and leave us a five star review in the iTunes Store. We're on Facebook, Libsyn, Stitcher, even Tumblr (hrpodcast.tumblr.com). We're everywhere, baby, so help spread the word!

Direct download: 19._DJ_Tanners_Day_Off.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Jessie Stegner has taken a short break from scrapbooking to aid us in our dissection of Mad Money, in which Jesse harbors a filthy secret and Joey can't seem to remember an astonishing debt from his past. If you're in the market for a crazed Monroe impersonator and DJ in a nauseating cowboy get-up then this is definitely your bag, baby. Don't forget, leave us a five star review in the iTunes store and shoot us a message at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. We await your kind words! And hey, did we mention we're on Tumblr now? Find us at hrpodcast.tumblr.com, ya goofs.

Direct download: 18._Mad_Money.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Becca Barish came back early from her trip to Israel just so she could be with us to discuss The Seven Month Itch, an epic two part saga in which almost nothing of consequence happens. True, Jesse moves out in a sexually impotent huff, and true, he hangs out with his supposedly cool friends at a ski lodge, but seriously, nothing much happens beyond that ... but there is a lot of padding! Get ready for padding, fans of said thing! If you haven't already please consider leaving us a five star review in the iTunes Store, checking us out on Facebook and shooting us an e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. Brandon will kiss you if you do as much! We can gurantee it, kiddo!

Direct download: 17._The_Seven_Month_Itch.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Bill Letz scored a touchdown three pointer before helping us tackle Just One of the Guys, in which a sexy teen heartthrob makes a guest appearance as sexy teen cousin Steve. Will Steve's bristling masculinity drive DJ to the brink of bloody violence? Yes, yes, it most assuredly will do just that. After this delightful episode take a bit of time to leave us a five star review in the iTunes Store, check out the Facebook page and e-mail us at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. And when you're done with that you can hit the showers! Sports!

Direct download: 16._Just_One_of_the_Guys.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Allison Kochanski jumped off the cardboard bridge that would have led to Junior Girl Scout stardom to help us examine Danny's Very First Date, in which a moron tries to go out with a doofus and everyone freaks the fuck out. Oh, and Jesse tries to build a treehouse (sic) for baby Michelle. Join us as we discuss Allison's Pocahontas birthday, her childhood adoration of her brother-in-law and why Michelle is a stupid, stupid baby who should be put away forever (according to Allison). Head on over to the iTunes Store and leave us a positive review! Like our Facebook page! Send us an e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com! No, YOU'RE YELLING.

Direct download: 15._Dannys_Very_First_Date.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Patrick Earls took time off from choreographic elaborate lip-sync routines to help us discuss But Seriously, Folks, in which Phyllis Diller upstages Joey for a full 90 minutes. As a result, Joey pulls a full Gordon Gecko and resolves to never pursue comedy again. Is this the gift humanity has been waiting for or will Joe prove to be even worse for the world? Find out by using your ears! Leave us a five star review in the iTunes Store and shoot an e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com, as well. You know you wanna, baby!

P.S. A hearty round of thanks to Zack Shornick for our spiffy new logo! XOXO

Direct download: 14._But_Seriously_Folks.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Michele Laubenthal popped in to take down A Pox in Our House, in which everyone but Danny, DJ and the ugliest baby in the world contract a case of the chicken pox. Will DJ make it to her first sleepover or will she be undone by the selfish aspirations of her father? Was Michele (our guest this week, not the ugly baby) able to avoid sleeping over at a total nerd's house or was she undone by an uncaring system run by ignorant adults? All of these questions are answered! If you haven't done so please make sure to leave us a five star review in the iTunes Store, like our page on Facebook and shoot us an e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. We'd love ya for it!

Direct download: 13._A_Pox_in_Our_House.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Joey Gilmore (who, despite Jon's needling, is not a monster but instead quite a lovely gentleman) saunters into the studio for Half A Love Story, in which Jesse is a sniveling, sexist baby who can't stand the idea of a woman resisting his grimy advances. Learn all about Joey's days as a scrappy traffic reporter and how this experience allows him to see right through the sham that is Full House. Cringe as you do a Google Image Search for King Kong Bundy. And when you're done, why not give us a five star review in the iTunes Store or contact us via our Facebook page / thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com? Ya know ya wanna reach out to these rude dudes!

Direct download: 12._Half_A_Love_Story.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Kristin Ramsey swam to us from the depths of a mermaid sea to figure out Sisterly Love, in which everyone is systematically trying to crush DJ's dreams of becoming a famous actor. A miniature Meryl Streep? FORGET IT, DJ. Kristin also waxes nostalgic on her star-making turn as Grandma VonShlapshtick, and trust us, every second is worth your time. If you've been on board so far and have yet to leave us a glowing review in the iTunes Store, here we are, Brandon and Jonathon, on our knees, asking, "Puh-witty pwease?" Nah, we're too rude for that. 'Cause we're just a couple a rude dudes! Get in touch with us via our Facebook page or thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com if you are a rude dude as well!

Direct download: 11._Sisterly_Love.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Kristin Hopkins zipped by the studio to examine Our Very First Promo, in which a ferret terrorizes the Tanner household and a Lupone-alike tries to give the family an Italian makeover. Are there moments of wildly arrogant racism? Oh, you can put good money on it, my friend, and be sure to stick around so Kristin can tell you all about her unconventional childhood swimming lessons. It's a terrifying story! Thank you so much to everyone who has taken the time to leave a five star review in the iTunes Store. Join the club and let us hear your glorious feedback! You can also reach us via e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. See you next week!

Direct download: 10._Our_Very_First_Promo.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Taylor Brown crosses our threshold to rap about 'The Big Three-O', in which Danny faces the Grim Reaper and a mysterious car accident forces us to once again question the death of Pam Tanner. Warning: This is an especially silly episode fueled by our delicious sponsor, Mountain Dew Baja Blast, so get ready for a little more giggling and nonsensical riffing than usual. Thought about leaving a five star review for the show in the iTunes Store? Make that dream a reality today! Get in touch with us on Facebook or via thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com! Let us know you're out there, fellow Rude Dudes.

Direct download: 09._The_Big_Three-O.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Adam Archer took a break from reciting the 3 Ninjas screenplay in its entirety to help us pick apart Joey's Place. Will Joey find his place ... in more ways than one? Or will he wind up in the gutter, bleeding from the mouth as punishment for his crimes against humanity? Only time will tell! If you have not yet found the time please consider leaving us a five star review in the iTunes Store. You can reach us via thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com or say hello on our Facebook page, which could always use a few more fans. We love fans! And you! Kisses. Mmm, sweet kisses. Bye!

Direct download: 08._Joeys_Place.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Stacey Smith came over to put us in headlocks and break down The Miracle of Thanksgiving, an episode in which everyone is sad but no one is willing to seek the help of a licensed therapist. Tuck in for some crispy dark meat because it gets pretty damn dark! Have you left us a five star review in the iTunes store? Please do so and help us rise in the ranks of the online globosphere, or, you know, whatever it's called! Also please feel free to send us feedback via thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com or on our Facebook page. See ya next week!

Direct download: 07._The_Miracle_of_Thanksgiving.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Trevor Martin clomp-clomp-clomps through our door to sift through the nonsense that is Jesse's Girl, in which the questionably named Corina Spicer creates a rift between our least favorite uncles. Find out why Trevor dropped his nickname at just the right moment and how to do a better Cowardly Lion than Joey before leaving a five star review in the iTunes Store. Wanna get in touch with us? Shoot an e-mail our way via thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. It will make us smile on our faces!

Direct download: 06._Jesses_Girl.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Britta Rowings rode by on her trusty bike to wax intellectual on Knock Yourself Out, in which Danny proves he is not quite ready for primetime and Michelle is vaguely sick (or so we are told). Ms. Rowings also relays a bit of info regarding primordial dwarves, so you will not wanna miss a second of this show, trust. Fans can reach out to us by leaving a glowing review in the iTunes store or shooting us an e-mail at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. Love ya!

Direct download: 05._Knock_Yourself_Out.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Alan Linic pays us a visit to deconstruct both Sea Cruise, in which Danny uses his wife’s death to inspire a late night fishing trip with the boys, and Daddy’s Home, in which Joey discovers a love for leather culture. Alan’s feedback is especially objective when you realize he had never seen a full episode before this session, much less two back to back. Are you loving the show? Let us know by leaving a five star review in the iTunes Store and/or contacting us via thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. Get in touch with us, munchkins!

Warning: With the understanding that we are all grown-ups here, please know Jon delivers some especially salty language this time around. You've been warned!

Direct download: 04._Sea_Cruise___Daddys_Home.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

Marie Maloney drops in to dissect a pair of surprisingly homophobic and sexist episodes. First up, The First Day of School, in which Stephanie has a crippling panic attack and DJ discovers she’s an omelette head. Then The Return of Grandma threatens to add three more cast members to the mix, one of which may be a drag queen. Are you on board for the full How Rude! experience? Take a few minutes to leave a review in the iTunes Store and/or send feedback to thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. We wanna hear from you!

Direct download: 03._The_First_Day_of_School___The_Return_of_Grandma.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

02. Our Very First Night

Willie Myers joins us to discuss the thoroughly maddening Our Very First Night as well as Jodie Sweetin’s unfortunately titled memoir, unSweetined (you can’t make this stuff up, folks). A heaping helping of gratitude goes out to Cary Davenport for creating our wonderful intro and outro music, as well as everyone out there listening. If you’re a fan please take a few minutes to leave a review in the iTunes Store and/or send feedback to thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com. You're the heart and the hand we hold onto!

Direct download: 02._Our_Very_First_Night.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST

01. Unaired Pilot / Our Very First Show

Jonathon Pernisek and Brandon Shockney kick off How Rude! The Full House Podcast by deconstructing both the original, unaired pilot (starring John Posey in place of Bob Saget) and the first official episode, Our Very First Show. Newsflash: Full House may not be a great series. If you have any questions or comments please feel free to contact us at thehowrudepodcast@gmail.com.

Direct download: 01._Our_Very_First_Show.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00pm EST