How Rude! The Full House Podcast

Johnny Kyle Cook is a fan of John Stamos' plump ass, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't top Danny Tanner in a heartbeat. Join him and your ever reliable co-hosts as they dive into "Ol' Brown Eyes", in which Danny is determined to hijack DJ's fundraiser just so he can prove he's super duper cool. Doesn't Danny understand DJ's school needs to buy a new COM-PEW-TER? Danny, you fool! Did we mention Michelle understands the concept of petty vengeance? She understands the concept of petty vengeance now. Also on the docket: Old school computer games, "homo" music, and the high concept behind 'Tiny Toon Adventures'. Strap in and get ready for that plump ass because it is a beautiful, plump ass. Split that peach! XOXO

Direct download: 78._Ol_Brown_Eyes_Final.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:27am EDT

Matt Mayerle doesn't think people would pay to have their music constantly interrupted. Brandon thinks otherwise. Jon is going to make a lot of money with Flip Foam. None of them had fun watching "Working Girl", in which DJ gets a job as some creep's Happy Helper just so she can get a pair of Blowouts. Unfortunately, her grades suffer as a result, and Kimmy's penchant for garbage forgeries isn't helping the situation. But that's not all! You're gonna get some prime Pizza Tower stories and the Gibbler Guarantee, so sit your sweet booty down and relax, kiddo. XOXO

Direct download: 77._Working_Girl_Final.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:26am EDT

Lou Leonardo related to this week's episode of 'Full House' in a way he could have never expected, and the story he tells is truly one for the ages. Join us we discuss "Happy New Year", in which poor Joey is pressured to find a date and winds up "falling in love" with the first woman who happens to enjoy rollerblading. We were running on a low laptop charge this time around, so unfortunately the episode does wrap up pretty quickly. That said, we did discuss Lou's catch phrases after recording, and they were "Yahtzee!" and "At the end of the day ..." The former was from childhood and inspired by Lou's fun-loving Italian Uncle, and the latter is an adult's way of sorting through the bullshit so as to focus on what's important. You may have troubles, you may have woes, but at the end of the day, whaddya got? Ya got great friends like Lou! This is a fantastic episode. This is a fantastic podcast! Give a us a five star review, won't you? Happy New Year 1991! XOXO

Direct download: 76._Happy_New_Year.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:26am EDT

Steven King has portrayed Jesus, lorded over his own Mother, and found himself in one of Hollywood's seedier corners after a particularly disastrous taping of 'Deal or No Deal'. We're gonna unpack all of that but today's main objective is a calm, rational discussion of "Danny in Charge", in which the Tanner patriarch totally drops the ball while Joey and Jesse are off fucking animals somewhere in the woods. It's a mash-up of forgettable plots that had us longing for the creative risks of "Secret Admirer", if that tells you anything. Thank you, Steven, for being our Rude Dude for the week, and may the Lord bless and keep you! XOXO

Direct download: 75._Danny_in_Charge.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:32am EDT

Molly Jones may be a little confused as to the chronology of the Austin Powers films but that doesn't mean we love her any less! Molly is a wonder and we were so happy to have her in the studio for this, a stirring discussion of 'Secret Admirer'. Rusty is back and he's determined to destroy the Tanner clan, this time by way of sexual confusion. But what Rusty could never predict ... is that he could fall in love in the process. Oh love, how you play with our minds! We shall learn all about Molly's lifetime infatuation with backwards caps and why Comet loves hamburgers, so kick back and relax, mate. It's time to start the show! P.S. NO AUDIO ISSUES! Oh God, I can breathe again. You have no idea how badly that was driving me (Jon) up a wall. Love you! XOXO

Direct download: 74._Secret_Admirer.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:43am EDT

Chris Johnson is an adorable Gooby who has enough catch phrases to fill a large sack. He's simply the best! Join us as we wade through the muck and mire that is "Terror in Tanner Town", a bracing look at one little boy's descent into madness. Rusty isn't here for your comedy or your pot roast or your basic as fuck love. Rusty knows what makes this world move and it's chaos, baby. Pure, unbridled chaos. We'll also learn why a magic cat who controls the cast with marionette strings would make for a better viewing experience, as well as Brandon's history with the Playmobil corporation. Strap in and hold on to your hats because this shit is gonna get fantastic! XOXO

Direct download: 73._Terror_in_Tanner_Town.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:46am EDT

FAIR WARNING: The audio for this podcast includes a large amount of crackle, due to us possibly picking up some random feedback while recording. On the plus side, it has been filtered through GarageBand's Cool Jazz Combo setting, so said crackle isn't nearly as distracting as it was upon first detection. 

Our second marathon session means the return of a beloved Rude Dude and this time around it's none other than Kristin Ramsey! Kristin may have pulled a muscle in her back but she was bound and determined to watch three crummy episodes of 'Full House' for your amusement. Those three episodes: Viva Las Vegas (in which Joey opens for Wayne Newton), Shape Up (in which DJ stops eating for three days), and One Last Kiss (in which Jesse cheats on Becky). You ready for it? You ready for Party Teddy? Let's go! XOXO

Direct download: 72._Marathon_October_Modified.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:35am EDT

SPOILER ALERT: 'Full House! The Musical Parody!' is a Goddamn delight, stuffed to the gills with deep cut references to the sitcom's history and enough raunchy material to make Jon blush (and that is certainly saying something). Hilarious performances, straight up show stopping numbers, what's not to love? Check out our group interview with co-writer and co-director Bob McSmith; Seth Blum; Marie Eife, and Meg Halcovage to find out more about their experience with the show. They're an amazing group of people and you don't wanna miss out on this, trust.

Get your tickets today by visiting fullhousethemusical.com and nab a free pair of sunglasses from Matt at the merchandise table by using #FullHousetheMusical on social media. The show runs through Saturday, December 19 (keep your fingers crossed for an extension), so make plans to see it today! We're not just saying this because we got free T-shirts, either. I mean, yes, we got free T-shirts, and the T-shirts are great, but the T-shirts didn't alter our perceptions. The show is wonderful! And those T-shirts ... those beautiful T-shirts. My God. We actually might do anything to keep these T-shirts. Don't touch our fucking T-shirts. XOXO

Direct download: 71._Full_House_The_Musical_Parody.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:46am EDT

You may think you've consumed all of your Halloween confectionary but look again! Peer into your spooky plastic pumpkin and I'm sure you'll find this, a delicious bit of podcasting for your oh so hungry ears. It's a supplemental episode this time around, which means your hosts are on their tummies once more to bring you their thoughts on an early John Stamos credit. 'Never Too Young to Die' is a fevered mash-up of the James Bond and Mad Max aesthetics, which means it makes little to no sense and features some of the worst music you're likely to find. That said, it does star Gene Simmons as a "bizarre" villain along with a thoroughly bummed George Lazenby, so there's definitely a few worthwhile elements. Wanna hear about Brandon's bachelor lifestyle? Wanna hear Jon's audition for the role of Ragnar in the forthcoming stage production of NTYTD? Then stop munching on those chocolate leftovers and start consuming a real treat!

Direct download: 70._Never_Too_Young_to_Die.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:07am EDT

Peter Kim is disgusted by parents who kiss their children on the mouth and that is just one of the many reasons why he fits right in with the Rude Dude crowd. Peter is on hand to help us dissect "A Pinch for a Pinch", in which Jesse's Mutually Assured Destruction theory of parenting leads to Michelle discovering a lust for petty violence. You cut me? I cut you. Two go in. NONE COME OUT. Speaking of coming out, Peter was a very sassy, very gay teenager who held his evangelical beliefs close to the chest, but you'll hear all about that soon enough. Peter is amazing. Start listening now! Also, stick around for a short addendum in which you'll hear all about our plans for the next episode as well as our forthcoming trip to NYC. That's right, the Rude Dudes are headed for the Big Red Apple, baby! XOXO

Direct download: 69._A_Pinch_for_a_Pinch.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:45am EDT