How Rude! The Full House Podcast






November 2015
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Chris Johnson is an adorable Gooby who has enough catch phrases to fill a large sack. He's simply the best! Join us as we wade through the muck and mire that is "Terror in Tanner Town", a bracing look at one little boy's descent into madness. Rusty isn't here for your comedy or your pot roast or your basic as fuck love. Rusty knows what makes this world move and it's chaos, baby. Pure, unbridled chaos. We'll also learn why a magic cat who controls the cast with marionette strings would make for a better viewing experience, as well as Brandon's history with the Playmobil corporation. Strap in and hold on to your hats because this shit is gonna get fantastic! XOXO

Direct download: 73._Terror_in_Tanner_Town.m4a
Category:general -- posted at: 6:46am EST

FAIR WARNING: The audio for this podcast includes a large amount of crackle, due to us possibly picking up some random feedback while recording. On the plus side, it has been filtered through GarageBand's Cool Jazz Combo setting, so said crackle isn't nearly as distracting as it was upon first detection. 

Our second marathon session means the return of a beloved Rude Dude and this time around it's none other than Kristin Ramsey! Kristin may have pulled a muscle in her back but she was bound and determined to watch three crummy episodes of 'Full House' for your amusement. Those three episodes: Viva Las Vegas (in which Joey opens for Wayne Newton), Shape Up (in which DJ stops eating for three days), and One Last Kiss (in which Jesse cheats on Becky). You ready for it? You ready for Party Teddy? Let's go! XOXO

Direct download: 72._Marathon_October_Modified.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:35am EST

SPOILER ALERT: 'Full House! The Musical Parody!' is a Goddamn delight, stuffed to the gills with deep cut references to the sitcom's history and enough raunchy material to make Jon blush (and that is certainly saying something). Hilarious performances, straight up show stopping numbers, what's not to love? Check out our group interview with co-writer and co-director Bob McSmith; Seth Blum; Marie Eife, and Meg Halcovage to find out more about their experience with the show. They're an amazing group of people and you don't wanna miss out on this, trust.

Get your tickets today by visiting and nab a free pair of sunglasses from Matt at the merchandise table by using #FullHousetheMusical on social media. The show runs through Saturday, December 19 (keep your fingers crossed for an extension), so make plans to see it today! We're not just saying this because we got free T-shirts, either. I mean, yes, we got free T-shirts, and the T-shirts are great, but the T-shirts didn't alter our perceptions. The show is wonderful! And those T-shirts ... those beautiful T-shirts. My God. We actually might do anything to keep these T-shirts. Don't touch our fucking T-shirts. XOXO

Direct download: 71._Full_House_The_Musical_Parody.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:46am EST

You may think you've consumed all of your Halloween confectionary but look again! Peer into your spooky plastic pumpkin and I'm sure you'll find this, a delicious bit of podcasting for your oh so hungry ears. It's a supplemental episode this time around, which means your hosts are on their tummies once more to bring you their thoughts on an early John Stamos credit. 'Never Too Young to Die' is a fevered mash-up of the James Bond and Mad Max aesthetics, which means it makes little to no sense and features some of the worst music you're likely to find. That said, it does star Gene Simmons as a "bizarre" villain along with a thoroughly bummed George Lazenby, so there's definitely a few worthwhile elements. Wanna hear about Brandon's bachelor lifestyle? Wanna hear Jon's audition for the role of Ragnar in the forthcoming stage production of NTYTD? Then stop munching on those chocolate leftovers and start consuming a real treat!

Direct download: 70._Never_Too_Young_to_Die.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:07am EST

Peter Kim is disgusted by parents who kiss their children on the mouth and that is just one of the many reasons why he fits right in with the Rude Dude crowd. Peter is on hand to help us dissect "A Pinch for a Pinch", in which Jesse's Mutually Assured Destruction theory of parenting leads to Michelle discovering a lust for petty violence. You cut me? I cut you. Two go in. NONE COME OUT. Speaking of coming out, Peter was a very sassy, very gay teenager who held his evangelical beliefs close to the chest, but you'll hear all about that soon enough. Peter is amazing. Start listening now! Also, stick around for a short addendum in which you'll hear all about our plans for the next episode as well as our forthcoming trip to NYC. That's right, the Rude Dudes are headed for the Big Red Apple, baby! XOXO

Direct download: 69._A_Pinch_for_a_Pinch.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:45am EST

Liz Larrimore may have been a know-it-all as a child but she grew up to have the kind of discerning eye that can identify a douchebag. One such douchebag: Dave Coulier, who "performed" for her college freshman orientation. Liz sat down with us to discuss Mr. Coulier as well as "Good News, Bad News", another episode in which Kimmy and DJ work together and everyone else suffers as a result. On a similar note, Becky and Danny co-host a terrible TV show and no amount of rebranding is going to change that. Do you notice the audio ping-pong tick-tack? Look, we've invested in a new mic and it shouldn't be a problem in the future. Can you not spare a bit of mercy for your favorite Rude Dudes? Must you be such harsh masters, my lords? Love you! XOXO

Direct download: 68._Good_News_Bad_News.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:49am EST

WARNING: This episode features a fair amount of hammering in the background (not a ton but a fair amount) and there's a bit of audio clickety-clack as well (but again, just a bit, so stay calm). With that said, please welcome our latest honorary Rude Dude, Carlos Luna! Aside from having a fantastic surname, Carlos is an avid fan of the sitcom and has many a theory about the world in which the characters live. Join us as we JFK the shit out of "Slumber Party", in which a bunch of horrible little girls and their mothers refuse to consider anyone who may not have a mother. Seriously, fuck the Honeybees and their bullshit mind games, some kids don't have a Mom! There's a lot of storytelling clutter on the side, including Jesse's makeover for Michelle and a boring as fuck yard sale, but we'll unpack all of that. We'll also unpack Carlos' latchkey kid status and his time as a Blockbuster thief, so strap in, kids! XOXO

Direct download: 67._Slumber_Party.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:05am EST

This is now officially a mandate: Samantha Woodman is the second guest to bring us a treat without us asking and so from now on we are definitely asking: Will you bring us a treat when you sit down with us, future guests? We've had baklava and beer so you're gonna have to bring us something new. Something yummy or refreshing! Look, enough about our insatiable appetites for treats, we need to talk about "I.Q. Man". Can Jesse resist the allure of an older woman who wants to fuck his brains out on an oddly functional bathroom set for his latest ad campaign? Can Danny and Becky possibly make up for the glaring absence of Connie Chung? Can a sickly Stephanie escape the visceral horror of Dr. Michelle's homemade remedies? Yes. No. And no! We'll also talk about the pony business Samantha's mother runs, the joys of Garth Brooks, and why "Sammy" is not on the table. P.S. We did watch 'Grandfathered' right after this recording session and it fucking stunk. XOXO

Direct download: 66._I.Q._Man.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:47am EST

Hope Rehak is the first honorary Rude Dude who brought us dessert (baklava) and from now on we expect dessert from all of our guests. Here are some ideas for those future guests: Donuts. Pie. Gingersnaps! Hope is also just an all around fantastic individual and we were happy to have her for "Crimes and Michelle's Demeanor", an episode that doesn't live up to the dread its title inspires, if only by so much. Look, we've been saying this for over a year now: Michelle is a horrible monster tot who has been begging for a comeuppance and now it has finally arrived. Will she accept her punishment or fly in the face of mortal man's so-called authority? No spoilers! Will Jesse and Becky declare bankruptcy after a series of asinine financial decisions? No spoilers! We can spoil one thing though, and that's Hope's past as an author of fan fiction. Hear all about it ... now!

Direct download: 65._Crimes_and_Michelles_Demeanor.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:32am EST

Tom Fell is only two people removed from a major 'Full House' cast member and we can't decide if that's amazing, disturbing, or both. Tom is also just a hell of a guy and we were thrilled to have him by our side as we discussed "Greek Week", the S4 premiere in which everyone is tricked into marriage and Michelle's identical cousin shows Lifetime just how bad a wig can get. We'll also learn about Bob, who may or may not have found it in his heart to love Tom, and why Drake's may not be the hot spot for teens. Do you love our show? Have you expressed your love with an iTunes review? If not, maybe you never really loved us at all. Perhaps your love is nothing more than lust. We are not your smutty playthings, okay? Make an honest podcast out of us. Walk us around a table and take us home with you! XOXO

Quick Correction: 'Paris is Burning' is a time capsule of the '80s, not the '90s. That really is a fantastic documentary, so track it down on Netflix today. Also, fuck you, Madonna.

Direct download: 64._Greek_Week.m4a
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:49am EST

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